Matchmaker Usagi
by MyNameIsBlinky
Summary: Usagi is trying to pair up the Senshi so that they don't get lonely. After all, they did save her life multiple times. It's the least she can do! But things don't go as planned…and hilarity ensues. Last installment posted, plus some edits.
1. Oops

**Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.**

* * *

"Oh, Ami-chan!" Usagi sang. She has been playing matchmaker for months, and has found another match.

"Yes, Usagi-chan? Please don't tell me you are trying to pair me up with another guy!" Ami replied, shaking her head.

"Well, I have! You'll like him! He's interested in school, and he wants to be a doctor, just like you!" Usagi said, excitedly. "His name is Izô Iyashino!"

Izô Sakura was very pretty. Some would say that he looked almost like a girl, with his long, curly strawberry-blond hair and dark green eyes, and to top it off, a very feminine build.

"Hi!" A female voice made him jump. He spun around and saw Usagi behind him.

"Kyaa! You freaked me out! Don't sneak up on–who is that?" Izô exclaimed, and had began to lecture Usagi.

"Sakura-kun, this is Ami Mizuno! So you guys can talk and get to know each other–" Usagi started.

"NO!" Izô and Ami yelled in unison. "I am not interested in dating women!" Izô added.

"So…you're gay?" Usagi said, in a small voice.

"Yes, I'm gay!" Izô yelled.

Not having time to lecture Usagi about how not wanting to date women doesn't mean you're gay, Izô stormed off.

"Usagi-chan, why do you keep trying to pair me up with someone?!" Ami yelled, after Izô stormed off to night school.

"Because Mamo-chan and I thought that it would be unfair that we get to love and you're forbidden to even have a small crush." Usagi replied. "So we're gonna change that rule so that you don't get lonely."

"Usagi-chan, have you ever considered that friendship and romance can both keep you from being too lonely?" Ami asked.

"Yes. It's always good to meet new people."

"Bai! I need to night school now!" Ami yelled as she left.


	2. Unrequited

**Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon in any way, shape or form. Those rights belong to Naoko Takeuichi, not me!**

* * *

"Heyyyy, Masoto-kun?" Usagi greeted.

"What, Tsukino-san? Can't you see I'm a little busy?" Masoto Soujoin replied, icily. He was not in a good mood, for he recently found out that Naru had started dating Umino.

"C'mon, I know something–or someone–that'll put you in a better mood!" Usagi chimed, grabbing his shirt and attempting to drag him away.

However, Masoto held his ground, not trusting Usagi's judgement. Combined with the fact that Izô was also grabbing him, and Mitsuhide, however weak he was, was just a hair stronger than Usagi.

"Let–go–of–ME!" Masoto yelled, pulling his arms out of both of their hands with unnecessary force.

"Masoto, she's gonna try to pair you up with one of her ugly friends!" Izô warned into Masoto's ear.

Masoto was used to his frenemy's rudeness, so he just ignored that he had a) called him by his first name and b) didn't even add an honorific.

"Shaddup, Sakura-brain. You're uglier than any of her friends." Masoto yelled, before Usagi dragged him away again.

* * *

"Oh, Mako-chan!" Usagi greeted. Makoto Kino looked over and saw that Usagi was dragging a poor guy behind her who had long since given up.

A poor _cute_ guy.

"He looks like my old boyfriend…" Makoto swooned.

Masoto sweat-dropped. He was not really interested in her (he still had the hots for Naru-chan) but he had to admit that she was pretty.

That revelation happened just seconds before he turned tail and ran, with Makoto in hot pursuit.

* * *

**How do you guys like this matchmaking fail? Please R&amp;R!**


	3. Stalker!

**Hey guys! As you know, I have been off for a while and have changed quite a bit. So bear with me as I make appropriate changes to my stories to fit. ILYGSM**

* * *

Jei Daito was stalking a miko that had caught his eye at Sendazakakue. He had his binoculars, and he was up in a tree. Perfect. The only thing that could go wrong is if Usagi catches him and the miko notices him while he's stalking her.

Natrally, due to his crap luck, he gets noticed.

"Hey Jei-kun!" Usagi announces. "Meet Hino Rei-chan! I noticed that you have your eyes on her!"

"U-USAGI!" Jei yelled, making everyone at the Hiwaka Shrine notice his stalkerishness.

"Is he-STALKING ME?!" Rei screams.

Jei jumps from the tree and runs to Izô's house. Natrally, he's not home. (Well, he's actually directing Rei and Usagi to where Jei is, but that's not important.)

"Feck! _Izô-k__un_!**_ Izô_****_-kun_**!" Jei yells, to no avail.

And there ends the story of any kindling romance that Jei and Rei could have had, as Rei hits him over the head with a stick.

* * *

**Um...should I make my stories longer or is this length good?**


	4. End

**Disclaimer: Sailor Moon is respectfully owned by Naoko Takeuchi. Used without permission.**

* * *

**Hey guys! Now for the final installment in this series, a Minako x Kunzite opinion.**

**Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Usagi was feeling quite glum after the day's events. First, she realized that the guy she had attempted to pair up Ami-chan with is gay, then Masoto-kun got chased off by Mako-chan, and then, to rub it all in, Rei-chan caught Jei-kun stalking her. That'll ruin a budding relationship, alright. So she had to try with Saitô-kun this time.

"Hello, Saitô-kun!~3" Usagi cheerfully greeted.

"H-hi, Tsukino-san." Saitô shakily replied. He had finally escaped a "Mine" fight between Izô-kun (his boyfriend) and Minako-san. And now Usagi-san was bringing Minako _back_ with her.

"Saitô-sempaiiii~" Minako greeted lovingly.

"I told you that I have a boyfriend already!" Saitô exclaimed.

"Who?" Minako started tearing up. Saitô? _Boyfriend?_ Since when?

"Hi. I am." Izô teased, with truth.

"_No way, Izô-kun_! Is it true, Sempai?" Mina yelled, then asked.

"Um...ya...well..." Saitô sweatdrops. "Tsukino-san, before trying to pair up your friends with someone, _please check that they are single!" _

"Yes Saitô-kun." Usagi said, glumly.

"Hey...I just realized...now we can talk about boys together!" Minako chimed.

"Hmm. Oh ya!" everyone says in unison.

"Who wants ice cream?" Usagi asks.

_Well, at least one thing went well today, _Usagi thought.

* * *

**Hahaha! This is the final installment in tbe story so...see ya on my next one!**


End file.
